A closer look
Enochian magic is an incredibly complex system of ceremonial mysticism supposedly delivered to John Dee and Edward Kelley by literal angels who spoke an entirely unique, grammatically correct language. These sixteenth-century angels apparently spent hours dictating massively complicated grids of letters and completely terrifying apocalyptic prophecies, making heavenly communication seem significantly more tedious than filing a corporate tax return. The angelic language itself is so bizarrely structured that modern linguists are still arguing over whether Kelley was a completely unappreciated cryptographic genius or just a brilliant madman who hallucinated an entire alphabet. Modern occultists still use this chaotic system to try and summon these terrifyingly bureaucratic angels, despite the fact that the original angels explicitly told Dee that their primary goal was to bring about the violent end of the world. It requires a truly special level of spiritual arrogance to knowingly use an angelic language designed for the apocalypse just because you want help finding a better parking spot!
