stackyFACTSWhy take the clearly paved winding dirt road when you can forcefully wedge yourself against a near-vertical cliff face? Frantically mashing the controller tricks the physics engine into slowly propelling you upward in the most jagged, unnatural way possible.
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Walking normally is for absolute casuals when you can frantically hop your way across a landscape to shave three seconds off your commute. You look entirely…
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Running drains your energy bar in seconds, but leaping rapidly into the air like a heavily caffeinated kangaroo can be sustained endlessly. Propelling your…
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Buoyancy works entirely differently when wearing eighty pounds of solid steel. You can gracefully tread water and perform Olympic-level dives without the…
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Highly skilled veterans absolutely love creating brand new accounts just to psychologically torment beginners. It is the digital equivalent of an elite…
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Leaning forward until your nose practically touches the glass supposedly activates latent hyper-focus abilities. While it does absolutely nothing to improve…
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The moment the match gets serious, reclining is no longer an option. Shifting your posture so your nose is practically touching the monitor somehow unlocks a…
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