The crown thief who got a royal pension
If you're going to commit high treason, make sure the king thinks you're hilarious. In 1671, Thomas Blood bludgeoned the Keeper of the Jewels, flattened the royal crown with a mallet to fit it in his bag, and stuffed the sovereign's orb down his pants. Instead of executing him, King Charles II was so amused by the sheer audacity of the heist that he gave Blood a massive estate and an annual pension.

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