stackyFACTSAn arrogant writer fights off a supernatural darkness consuming a pacific northwest town armed primarily with a flashlight. His survival literally depends on constantly swapping out standard AA batteries at an alarming rate to melt away the evil shadows protecting local lumberjacks.
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The shockwave from highly concentrated explosives politely avoids tearing anyone apart. Instead, it gently tosses you backward, leaving you completely intact…
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Severe blood loss apparently acts as an adrenaline shot. Just when you think a massive foe is beaten, they abruptly glow bright red, heal themselves, and…
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Being surrounded by twenty heavily armed thugs is not actually dangerous. They will graciously wait in a neat circle, taking turns approaching you strictly…
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Mystical healing energies effortlessly penetrate three layers of heavy titanium plating to seal a wound. It is incredibly convenient that restorative spells…
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While you take massive damage from a minor scrape, your poorly equipped companion can absorb thirty grenades and simply take a brief knee to recover.
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Taking physical damage immediately coats your eyeballs in a thick layer of strawberry preserves, which naturally fades away if you hide behind a rock.
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