A closer look
Ancient Romans regularly imported urine from Portugal to use as mouthwash because the ammonia in it naturally whitened their teeth. This wasn't some back-alley peasant remedy either; it was a highly sought-after commodity among the Roman elite, to the point where Emperor Vespasian actually put a tax on the urine trade to line the state's pockets. The Portuguese urine was considered the strongest and most premium brand on the market, proving that luxury marketing has always been a complete scam. Wealthy aristocrats would literally swish imported human waste around their gums just to have a sparkling smile for their next vomitorium banquet. It really puts modern beauty standards into a cynical perspective when you realize our ancestors gargled pee just to look mildly attractive in a toga!
