A closer look
Walter Arnold received the world's very first speeding ticket in January 1896 for tearing through the streets of Kent, England, at an absolutely terrifying maximum speed of eight miles per hour in a two-mile-per-hour zone; the local police constable had to chase this reckless speed demon down on a bicycle, which paints a majestic historical picture of a sweaty man frantically pedaling after a motorized carriage moving slightly faster than a brisk jog before slapping Arnold with a one-shilling fine for his sociopathic need for speed, setting a brilliant precedent for centuries of highway patrol officers hiding behind billboards to tax us for being late to work, proving there is no greater testament to human evolution than transforming a leisurely bicycle pursuit into a multi-billion dollar traffic court industry
