stackyFACTSThe original slow cooker literally just consisted of throwing a bunch of hot rocks and raw meat into a dirt pit and completely burying it for hours.
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Lacking metal pots, they simply pulled red-hot rocks from a fire and dropped them directly into water-filled squash shells until it angrily bubbled.
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Cooking essentially meant crouching dangerously close to an open raging flame while desperately trying not to set your own sleeves completely on fire.
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Getting that absolutely perfect umami flavor required massive wooden barrels and a level of deep culinary patience modern humanity no longer possesses.
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You weren't actually supposed to eat the outside pastry; it functioned as medieval Tupperware designed solely to bake and hold the questionable meat inside.
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Microwaves made things entirely too easy. Early snackers would take dried kernels and stir them into a pot of scorching hot sand. The intense heat would…
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Because average citizens completely lacked proper home ovens, everyone literally dropped off their raw meat at the breadmaker to be roasted over the weekend.
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