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Myths & mysteries

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Ego dissolution makes you forget your own importance
Myths & mysteries

Ego dissolution makes you forget your own importance

Spending years meditating just to realize you are not the main character of the universe is a tough pill to swallow. It completely annihilates your personal…

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Master number thirty-three acts as the ultimate martyr
Myths & mysteries

Master number thirty-three acts as the ultimate martyr

The most self-sacrificing vibration of all practically demands that you set yourself on fire to keep others warm. It is the absolute peak of spiritual…

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Second energy tiers govern your supposedly creative urges
Myths & mysteries

Second energy tiers govern your supposedly creative urges

Located a bit higher up, this energetic vortex is blamed for both your artistic masterpieces and your terrible relationship choices. It is a highly volatile…

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Base energy centers prevent you from floating away
Myths & mysteries

Base energy centers prevent you from floating away

The lowest energetic hub is entirely responsible for making sure you remember to pay rent and eat food. Without it, mystics believe you would just turn into…

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Saucha requires obsessive cleanliness of your inner state
Myths & mysteries

Saucha requires obsessive cleanliness of your inner state

It is not enough to take a shower; you also have to aggressively scrub your thoughts of any impure ideas. Maintaining this level of internal hygiene is an…

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Dream yoga focuses on controlling nocturnal plots
Myths & mysteries

Dream yoga focuses on controlling nocturnal plots

Why rest when you can use your eight hours of shut-eye to practice intense spiritual discipline? You literally train yourself to stay spiritually awake while…

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Tapas involves intense self-discipline to clear impurities
Myths & mysteries

Tapas involves intense self-discipline to clear impurities

Willingly subjecting yourself to difficult circumstances to build character is a core mystical practice. It basically frames suffering as a highly efficient…

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Pranayama restricts your breathing intentionally
Myths & mysteries

Pranayama restricts your breathing intentionally

Controlling the exact duration of your inhales and exhales is touted as the key to enlightenment. Apparently, doing it manually is somehow vastly superior to…

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Asceticism turns aggressive self-denial into a quirky hobby
Myths & mysteries

Asceticism turns aggressive self-denial into a quirky hobby

Finding out exactly how little food, sleep, and comfort you can survive on is considered deeply spiritual. It is essentially an extreme survival challenge…

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Apophatic theology defines the divine by what it lacks
Myths & mysteries

Apophatic theology defines the divine by what it lacks

Instead of saying what the ultimate source is, this approach just lists everything it isn't. It is the philosophical equivalent of picking a restaurant by…

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Brahmacharya requires keeping your vital energies isolated
Myths & mysteries

Brahmacharya requires keeping your vital energies isolated

By hoarding your personal energy and never sharing it in intimate settings, you supposedly build up a massive spiritual reservoir. It is basically aggressive…

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Communication energy centers force you to speak your truth
Myths & mysteries

Communication energy centers force you to speak your truth

If you constantly blurt out inappropriate things, you can just claim this specific node is overly active. It governs self-expression, whether people actually…

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Number one signifies aggressive and bossy leadership
Myths & mysteries

Number one signifies aggressive and bossy leadership

In numerical mysticism, the very first digit is blamed for making people incredibly domineering and self-centered. It is the numerical equivalent of a…

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Santosha demands being annoyingly content with everything
Myths & mysteries

Santosha demands being annoyingly content with everything

No matter how terrible your day is going, this principle requires you to be completely satisfied with it. It borders on radical delusion but supposedly brings…

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Number four demands rigid and boring stability
Myths & mysteries

Number four demands rigid and boring stability

The most unexciting digit in the mystical numerical system governs rules, regulations, and going to bed at a reasonable hour. It is the absolute buzzkill of…

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Jnana yoga uses relentless intellectual inquiry
Myths & mysteries

Jnana yoga uses relentless intellectual inquiry

Instead of feeling their way to enlightenment, these practitioners try to out-think the universe. They will aggressively philosophize until reality itself…

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Number three is tied to chaotic creative expression
Myths & mysteries

Number three is tied to chaotic creative expression

If you need an excuse for being disorganized and extremely loud, just blame this digit. It supposedly vibrates with pure artistic energy and a complete lack…

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Summit energy nodes act as a funnel for mystical downloads
Myths & mysteries

Summit energy nodes act as a funnel for mystical downloads

The highest hub is supposedly an open roof that lets universal wisdom pour directly into your consciousness. It completely bypasses the need to actually read…

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