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Tourist traps exist solely to empty your wallet
Travel

Tourist traps exist solely to empty your wallet

These heavily advertised roadside attractions promise an awe-inspiring spectacle but deliver only overpriced lemonade and a giant ball of yarn. They survive…

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Hostels guarantee interaction with highly annoying youths
Travel

Hostels guarantee interaction with highly annoying youths

Sharing a dorm room means listening to a nineteen year old aggressively strum an acoustic guitar at sunrise. You pay a heavily discounted rate, but the true…

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Guidebooks lead you directly to overpriced garbage
Travel

Guidebooks lead you directly to overpriced garbage

The moment a hidden gem cafe is printed in a famous publication, it instantly doubles its prices and halves its quality. Following official recommendations is…

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Why a roadside motel at 3 a.m. feels ominous
Travel

Why a roadside motel at 3 a.m. feels ominous

Pulling into a dimly lit establishment at three in the morning guarantees a mattress that feels entirely composed of rusty springs. The flickering neon sign…

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Cave guides inflate the ages of rock formations
Travel

Cave guides inflate the ages of rock formations

While underground limestone formations do indeed grow at an incredibly sluggish pace, local tour operators frequently add a few random millions to the…

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Some famous waterfalls need pumps to keep flowing
Travel

Some famous waterfalls need pumps to keep flowing

In order to absolutely guarantee that visiting tourists get their perfect picturesque vacation photo, several massive iconic cascades utilize hidden bypass…

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Why airline points can be impossible to spend
Travel

Why airline points can be impossible to spend

Loyal flyers obsessively accumulate invisible digital tallies in hopes of securing a slightly wider seat. When they finally attempt to redeem these legendary…

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Motels were built strictly for tired motorists
Travel

Motels were built strictly for tired motorists

The iconic name is literally just a convenient mashup of motor and hotel. They offered easy parking directly outside the room so grimy drivers could avoid…

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Paying enormous tolls to cross private bridges
Travel

Paying enormous tolls to cross private bridges

In an effort to bypass congested public river crossings, wealthy individuals once funded massive suspension bridges purely as lucrative private investments.…

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Dragging extremely heavy fabrics around airports
Travel

Dragging extremely heavy fabrics around airports

We overpack massive fabric rectangles with outfits we will absolutely never wear on the actual trip. Dragging this cumbersome dead weight across cobblestone…

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Clapping incredibly loudly when the commercial flight lands
Travel

Clapping incredibly loudly when the commercial flight lands

A highly controversial subset of passengers feels the absolute need to applaud the pilot simply for successfully putting the plane on the runway. It is…

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Why tourists sit through sales pitches for free tickets
Travel

Why tourists sit through sales pitches for free tickets

Tourists willingly sit through hours of aggressive sales pitches for heavily overpriced shared condominiums just to get a complimentary theme park ticket. The…

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A straight border splits this African peninsula in two
Travel

A straight border splits this African peninsula in two

The Ras Nouadhibou peninsula is divided exactly down its center between Mauritania and Western Sahara by a hilariously rigid straight line drawn by distant…

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Losing your companions in crowded places
Travel

Losing your companions in crowded places

Wandering aimlessly around a busy plaza after getting separated, suddenly feeling like a lost toddler. Panic sets in as you realize you do not actually know…

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Getting severely burnt on day one
Travel

Getting severely burnt on day one

Ignoring sunscreen to get a quick tan, resulting in glowing red skin for the rest of the trip. You spend the remaining days hiding under umbrellas like a…

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Buying useless oversized souvenirs
Travel

Buying useless oversized souvenirs

Purchasing a giant sombrero or a massive wooden giraffe that absolutely will not fit anywhere convenient. Regret sets in the moment you have to carry it around.

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Arriving at the terminal extremely early
Travel

Arriving at the terminal extremely early

Sitting at the gate half a day before departure because missing your departure is your ultimate phobia. You spend the entire time guarding overpriced luggage.

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Fighting for bags at the hotel lobby
Travel

Fighting for bags at the hotel lobby

Staring blankly at endless black suitcases, silently praying yours was not lost entirely. Spotting your bag brings a rush of relief matched only by the…

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