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Myths & mysteries

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Early modern astrologers blamed the devastating bubonic plague on a nasty alignment of Mars and Jupiter
Myths & mysteries

Early modern astrologers blamed the devastating bubonic plague on a nasty alignment of Mars and Jupiter

When you have absolutely no idea what bacteria is, you blame the sky. During the Black Death, the faculty of the University of Paris officially declared that…

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Supermoon is a term coined by a modern astrologer in 1979 rather than an actual astronomer
Myths & mysteries

Supermoon is a term coined by a modern astrologer in 1979 rather than an actual astronomer

You would think the dramatic title of 'Supermoon' came from NASA, but it is purely astrological branding. Astrologer Richard Nolle coined the term in 1979 to…

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Taurus embodies the stubborn toddler phase of existence
Myths & mysteries

Taurus embodies the stubborn toddler phase of existence

Their cosmic age matches a two-year-old whose favorite word is firmly 'no'. This perfectly rationalizes their absolute refusal to move, change their mind, or…

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Decans split every single sign into three micro-sections
Myths & mysteries

Decans split every single sign into three micro-sections

Just when you thought learning twelve archetypes was annoying, this system chops each one into three ten-degree chunks. It is a brilliant excuse used to…

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Hermes Trismegistus is entirely fictional despite centuries of alchemists worshipping his texts
Myths & mysteries

Hermes Trismegistus is entirely fictional despite centuries of alchemists worshipping his texts

The founding father of alchemy and master of universal secrets is basically the ancient equivalent of a corporate mascot. Philosophers spent centuries quoting…

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Occultist Aleister Crowley was literally kicked out of a secret magic society for being too weird
Myths & mysteries

Occultist Aleister Crowley was literally kicked out of a secret magic society for being too weird

You know you have boundary issues when the people wearing robes and chanting in basements tell you to tone it down. Aleister Crowley, self-dubbed 'The Great…

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White garments loudly reflect incoming vibrations
Myths & mysteries

White garments loudly reflect incoming vibrations

Wearing all white is basically an aggressive act of metaphysical defiance. Esoteric tradition claims the color bounces every single frequency directly back at…

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Aries moon means you process feelings with pure rage
Myths & mysteries

Aries moon means you process feelings with pure rage

Sadness is essentially just anger that hasn't figured out where to punch yet. With your emotional core driven by pure fire and momentum, you absolutely refuse…

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Sagittarius placements view tact as an offensive concept
Myths & mysteries

Sagittarius placements view tact as an offensive concept

Filtering their thoughts before speaking seems like a complete waste of breath. They will drop an incredibly harsh truth in the middle of a casual chat and…

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Third man factor spawns imaginary survival companions
Myths & mysteries

Third man factor spawns imaginary survival companions

When pushed to the absolute edge of physical endurance, mountain climbers often report a helpful invisible presence guiding them. Your brain basically…

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Anjali mudra folds hands in deep respect
Myths & mysteries

Anjali mudra folds hands in deep respect

Pressing your palms together at your chest is a universal sign of reverence. This simple physical alignment unites the left and right sides of your body,…

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Asteroid Chariklo demands holding space with borders
Myths & mysteries

Asteroid Chariklo demands holding space with borders

This quiet little rock revolves around silent support and creating safe spaces. It marks where you are expected to be the calm, rational adult in the room,…

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Soviet space programs secretly consulted lunar calendars before launching actual dogs into the vacuum of space
Myths & mysteries

Soviet space programs secretly consulted lunar calendars before launching actual dogs into the vacuum of space

You'd think firing innocent animals into the terrifying void of space would be purely based on strict aeronautical math, but no. Rumors persist that Soviet…

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Billionaire banker J.P. Morgan famously claimed that only the ultra-rich actually rely on astrology
Myths & mysteries

Billionaire banker J.P. Morgan famously claimed that only the ultra-rich actually rely on astrology

The quote 'Millionaires don't use astrology, billionaires do' is heavily attributed to J.P. Morgan, the ruthless titan of American finance. While historical…

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Part of Fortune is the exact spot you get lucky
Myths & mysteries

Part of Fortune is the exact spot you get lucky

Hidden deep in the chart is a specific coordinate that allegedly reveals exactly where the universe stops punishing you. Finding it feels like uncovering a…

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Rubbing fresh mint on physical cash attracts more
Myths & mysteries

Rubbing fresh mint on physical cash attracts more

Vigorously rubbing mint leaves onto your paper bills is believed to magnetically draw more wealth to you. The cashier might look at you strangely when you…

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Archons act as petty jailers of the material universe
Myths & mysteries

Archons act as petty jailers of the material universe

In certain esoteric frameworks, these entities function strictly as cosmic middle management. Their sole purpose is to maintain the illusion of the material…

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Medical astrology links body parts to planets
Myths & mysteries

Medical astrology links body parts to planets

Medical astrology links physical body parts to corresponding planets. This ancient diagnostic method claims that your chronic headaches are literally just…

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Blending your mind with local tap water
Myths & mysteries

Blending your mind with local tap water

To deeply understand the fluid nature of reality, some practitioners will aggressively concentrate on a plain bowl of water until their consciousness…

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Crimson heavily screams absolute Aries aggression
Myths & mysteries

Crimson heavily screams absolute Aries aggression

The color crimson universally signals danger, stop signs, and boiling anger. Naturally, it is the exact visual frequency of an Aries who has just been told…

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Paracelsus created an alphabet based entirely on dagger shapes
Myths & mysteries

Paracelsus created an alphabet based entirely on dagger shapes

Typography strictly meant for people who really enjoy sharp objects. In his relentless pursuit of esoteric encoding, the famous physician designed a specific…

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Pineapples officially belong to the Sun
Myths & mysteries

Pineapples officially belong to the Sun

Loud, spiky on the outside, and incredibly bright and sweet on the inside. The Sun governs pineapples because they practically scream vitality and demand to…

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Syncretism carelessly mashes different theologies together
Myths & mysteries

Syncretism carelessly mashes different theologies together

Sometimes people cannot decide which massive, complicated system of belief to follow, so they just aggressively blend them all together. This practice takes…

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Oldest surviving astrological text is just a Babylonian spreadsheet tracking the planet Venus for bad omens
Myths & mysteries

Oldest surviving astrological text is just a Babylonian spreadsheet tracking the planet Venus for bad omens

Long before Co-Star was sending you cryptic, aggressive push notifications, the Venus tablet of Ammisaduqa was getting the job done. It's literally just a…

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