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Top decks of buses provide excellent views of tree branches
Travel

Top decks of buses provide excellent views of tree branches

Snagging the front seat on a double-decker bus feels like a massive victory until the vehicle scrapes against low-hanging foliage. You spend the entire…

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Taking photos with a tablet absolutely destroys your dignity
Travel

Taking photos with a tablet absolutely destroys your dignity

Holding up a massive pane of glowing glass blocks the view for absolutely everyone behind you. It is the least subtle way to capture a blurry photo while…

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Swedish bakeries sell massive quantities of cinnamon buns
Travel

Swedish bakeries sell massive quantities of cinnamon buns

Participating in the local afternoon coffee ritual means ingesting heavily spiced, sugary pastries on a daily basis. It is the socially acceptable way to eat…

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Multi-country rail passes require paying extra for seats
Travel

Multi-country rail passes require paying extra for seats

After dropping hundreds of dollars on a magic ticket that supposedly grants unlimited transit, you quickly discover every decent route requires a mandatory…

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Overpacking ensures lugging clean shirts all around
Travel

Overpacking ensures lugging clean shirts all around

The irrational fear of spilling soup on yourself five times a day forces you to lug heavy bags completely stuffed with unworn garments. You essentially take…

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Spanish dinners rarely commence before ten at night
Travel

Spanish dinners rarely commence before ten at night

Showing up to a restaurant at six in the evening ensures you will be dining alone or accompanied strictly by confused elderly tourists. You must completely…

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Buying physical local SIM cards is largely obsolete nowadays
Travel

Buying physical local SIM cards is largely obsolete nowadays

The glorious ritual of aggressively poking your smartphone with a tiny paperclip in a busy train station has been fully replaced by digital roaming profiles.…

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The water taxi that costs about as much as gum
Travel

The water taxi that costs about as much as gum

Crossing the creek in a traditional wooden transit boat costs roughly the same amount as a single piece of cheap chewing gum. It is one of the few experiences…

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Belgian waffles are mostly a tourist tradition
Travel

Belgian waffles are mostly a tourist tradition

Locals are not wandering the streets eating massive pastries buried under two pounds of chocolate sauce and whipped cream. It is a sugary trap designed…

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Group walking tours completely block the entire sidewalk
Travel

Group walking tours completely block the entire sidewalk

Thirty people wearing matching lanyards suddenly stopping to stare at a very old door creates a completely impenetrable human wall. They blissfully ignore the…

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Stopping on a sidewalk for a selfie angers the crowds
Travel

Stopping on a sidewalk for a selfie angers the crowds

Halting abruptly in a massive stream of pedestrian traffic just to photograph your own face in front of a clock tower is a remarkably fast way to get shoved.…

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Why Thai tuk-tuks can cost more than taxis
Travel

Why Thai tuk-tuks can cost more than taxis

Tourists eagerly pay a massive premium to suck in exhaust fumes while careening through traffic in an open-air metal cage. It is essentially an expensive,…

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Why German taxis can feel like luxury cars
Travel

Why German taxis can feel like luxury cars

Rather than rattling around in a beat-up sedan, paying for a ride here often means sitting in the plush back seat of a high-end Mercedes. You get to feel…

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Public binoculars at viewpoints demand exorbitant coin fees
Travel

Public binoculars at viewpoints demand exorbitant coin fees

After hiking all the way to a scenic overlook, you are presented with mounted metal tubes that demand heavy coinage just to function. If you refuse to pay,…

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Why authentic tacos don't come with yellow cheese
Travel

Why authentic tacos don't come with yellow cheese

The crispy shells filled with neon orange dairy are a complete fabrication of fast-food chains. Real street tacos rely on simple fresh ingredients, completely…

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High-speed trains connecting the UK to Europe go underwater
Travel

High-speed trains connecting the UK to Europe go underwater

Passengers casually sip coffee while rocketing through a concrete tube buried beneath miles of dark water. It is an engineering marvel that is best enjoyed by…

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Why luxury train passengers pay thousands for a tiny bed
Travel

Why luxury train passengers pay thousands for a tiny bed

Patrons gleefully hand over the equivalent of a mortgage payment just to wear fancy clothes and drink champagne in a shaking, narrow corridor. The romantic…

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In Japan, taxi doors open themselves
Travel

In Japan, taxi doors open themselves

Reaching for the exterior door handle is a rookie mistake that will absolutely earn you a harsh glare from the driver. The automated doors are an elegant…

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